Correspondence Q&As and Comments

I thought I had to wait a year to write to my donor family.

There is no time frame for writing. Recipients can write whenever they are comfortable in doing so.

I'm afraid I will upset the family and remind them of their loss.

Families live with their loss daily. They often express that donation was the one good thing that came from their loved one's death--the ability to help others.

What if the family does not want to hear from me?

Families are asked if they would like to receive a correspondence before it is sent to them. Many families express how important it is to them to hear from recipients. For those who choose not to accept the letter, it is not an indication of lack of gratitude. Rather, it most likely reflects where they are in their grief process.  Letters remain available for families who may wish to receive them at a later time.

I wrote to the donor family and never received a reply.

Not all families are ready or able to reply at any given time. That in no way means they did not appreciate receiving your letter. Some families reply years later.

I want to send a thank you but don't want to continue to write to the family.

You are encouraged to write as many times, or as often as you are comfortable. Recipients have the option of whether or not they wish to receive correspondence from the donor family.

I am a terrible writer and don't know what to say.

Donor families have said how much they value what was said and not how it was said. You can always send a card instead of writing a letter, or ask a family member to write on your behalf.  Guidelines for corresponding with donor families may be obtained from your transplant center or Lifebanc.

I am not ready to write and don't know if I ever will be.

It is your choice to write. Not everyone feels comfortable or has an interest in corresponding with their donor family.

I don't want to write to my family until I am in better health.

What you write and when you write it are strictly up to you.

I feel so guilty that my donor's family lost a loved one and I am doing well.

Donor families often express great appreciation about hearing from recipients and knowing that someone has been helped.

I don't know if my donor family received my letter.

To check on the status of your letter, contact the Lifebanc Bereavement Coordinator at (888) 558-5433 or (216) 752-5433.